Bring a pillow to latest vampire flick

We are in a constant search for a good fit in life. Little things like Levis jeans and big things like relationships all have to fit in our lives. The problem is that most things fit by virtue of a trial and error process and error is the operative word

We are in a constant search for a good fit in life. Little things like Levis jeans and big things like relationships all have to fit in our lives. The problem is that most things fit by virtue of a trial and error process and error is the operative word.

A good example of a bad fit for me on a small scale is the much hyped teenage vampire movie Twilight. I’m a little old school when it comes to vampires because I want them to do something within their range of hobbies which should include blood-sucking and moments of victim terror. This movie was a series of sullen poses that involved moody and self-absorbed young adults wallowing in their own self-importance. The only tangible horror in this movie was that it reminded me of that one main hallway in my high school days at the Comp where everybody was in a futile search for any semblance of coolness.

To be honest, I fell asleep during this movie. I wished I could have dreamed about a different Twilight plotline that had me choking out the Twilight producer that sucked the life out of vampire movies. Anyhow, I saw a part of the first Twilight movie on TV and the best way to get me to see the sequel is to bring a gun because this is a case where the movie itself sucked far more than the vampires in the movie. Not a good fit.

The last good fit for me in movie world was The Wrestler. Sometimes a slice of somebody else’s life is all we should need in a good movie. Granted, none of us would be very interested in a life swap with Mickey Rourke’s character, but it was a very good flick with a dreary look at the wrestling world as a sidebar to a life in freefall. This movie was ‘Rocky’ without the positives.

New music is a bad fit with me. Country music seems to have more guitar riffs than Whole Lotta Love by Led Zeppelin but with whiney “dead dog, faithless love and rusty pickup” twang vocals to make it still pass as a country song.

The net result is an unpalatable mess similar to adding mustard to Cheerios.

Then you have the new Top 40 sound that blends hip hop talk sequences with real musical harmonies and an actual melody. These songs remind me of a car that almost starts but not quite. They fire for a few seconds then fall back into a rhythm of starter motor noise. The songs have a semblance of musicality and then some flat-voiced idiot starts to talk in the middle of the song. That is not a good fit for me and it barely makes sense.

Fortunately I found an antidote on PBS. They aired a vintage Marvin Gaye concert that showcased this silky-voiced musical legend at his finest. The only thing that ever slowed down Marvin’s talent was bad judgement and good aim at close range with a 38. But his music will always be a great fit in my world and a good way to end this column on a positive note.

Jim Sutherland may be reached at mystarcollectorcar.com

Just Posted

BREAKING: Delburne man found not guilty in connection with 2016 fatal rollover

Daniel Wayne Newsham had been on trial for manslaughter

Loan officer accused of $1 million fraud to plead guilty

Accused allegedly forged customer names to get loans while working at Sylvan Lake bank

Red Deer to get new plan to end homelessness as problem persists

Despite some successes there’s ‘a long way to go,’ says manager

‘A stronger Alberta:’ Ottawa announces $1.6B for Canada’s oil and gas sector

Ottawa is spending $1.6 billion to help struggling energy companies stay afloat,… Continue reading

Canada ranks 16th on World Economic Forum’s annual gender gap list

TORONTO — Canada has landed the 16th spot in the World Economic… Continue reading

Chabot scores overtime winner to lift Senators over Predators 4-3

OTTAWA — Thomas Chabot saw an opening and he took it. And… Continue reading

Canadian Marielle Thompson earns World Cup ski cross bronze in season opener

AROSA, Switzerland — Canada’s Marielle Thompson captured bronze at the opening World… Continue reading

Canada doesn’t make Oscars short list for best foreign language film

LOS ANGELES — Canada is no longer in the running for best… Continue reading

Warrant issued for arrest of ‘Schwimmer lookalike’ suspect

LONDON — A British judge has issued an arrest warrant for an… Continue reading

Moneywise: Canadian workers unhappy with pay, want pension plans

Many working Canadians are feeling underpaid and are so worried about their… Continue reading

Brazil police say faith healer has turned himself in

RIO DE JANEIRO — A celebrity faith healer accused of sexually abusing… Continue reading

B.C. hockey coach creates ‘gear library’ to remove cost barrier of sport

VANCOUVER — Nicola Froese says she has always loved playing sports, but… Continue reading

Canada’s Kim McRae finishes seventh at luge World Cup in Lake Placid, N.Y.

LAKE PLACID, N.Y. — Canada’s Kim McRae finished in seventh place at… Continue reading

Most Read