Concerned about a female friend

I met “John” six months ago and truly love him. I moved four hours away from my friends, family and kids to be with him. He says he loves me and appreciates that I gave up a lot for him.

Dear Annie: I met “John” six months ago and truly love him.

I moved four hours away from my friends, family and kids to be with him. He says he loves me and appreciates that I gave up a lot for him.

The problem is, he has a female friend who calls him a lot. John assures me he isn’t hiding anything. As a matter of fact, I’ve met her a few times. Her daughter plays softball with John’s daughter, so they sit together at the games. She’s going through tough times with her husband.

Maybe I’m just jealous, but it bothers me that she calls him every other day. I’ve discussed it with John, and he says my reaction concerns him because it means I have trust issues. I feel there’s something between them, but I can’t pinpoint it. Am I over-thinking this? I don’t want to have these doubts, but I also don’t want to get hurt. — Flustered in Florida

Dear Flustered: It’s fine for people to have friends of the opposite sex, but not if the relationship completely excludes one of their partners. Offer to meet this woman for coffee. Invite her and her husband over for dinner. If John objects or behaves differently around her, you have reason to worry.

Dear Annie: My sister-in-law has always been fashion-challenged, but this summer she has been sporting a pair of shorts that are so tiny, you can see everything spilling out of the front and back.

She recently had a baby and made the comment that she still has to wear her “maternity” shorts. I can’t imagine what maternity shop would have sold those for pregnant women. This has become the talk of our family. It is disgusting to see her in this get-up. It’s indecent. I can’t believe my brother lets her leave the house like that, and I am embarrassed for them both.

Is there a tactful way to say something to her or my brother, or do I just keep my mouth shut? My sister-in-law is very sensitive and stubborn, and I worry I’d only upset her and make her resent me. — Wincing in Wisconsin

Dear Wisconsin: Say nothing. Your sister-in-law has convinced herself that she looks sexy in those shorts, and your brother either agrees or doesn’t care. If she’s sensitive and stubborn, she will not take kindly to your constructive criticism and will simply assume you don’t like her. Leave it alone.

Dear Annie: I would like to encourage “Ill and Lonely” to join a cancer support group. s

I’ve been fighting Stage IV breast cancer for three years. I completely understand her complaint that friends and family have been great, but after a while, the phone calls and visits become sparse.

I joined a local breast cancer support group when I was first diagnosed, and it’s been a wonderful source of help, understanding, comfort and fun times.

When I get lonely or down, I’ll call one of my support group sisters and they will boost me up.

You can find local support groups by asking your doctor, nurse, a local hospital or other survivors or by going online. The American Cancer Society is great in setting up groups. If there is no group in her area, she can start one with the people she’s met at the doctor’s office or while having treatments.

It makes a world of difference to meet with other patients or survivors who have gone through this. We also have oncology doctors, nurses, physical therapists and others who occasionally speak at our meetings. You don’t have to be alone when you have “brothers” and “sisters” within a support group. — A Bald “Sister”

Dear Sister: Thanks so much for the good advice. Please know we’ll be thinking of you.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611.

Just Posted

UPDATED: Officials tour Hwy 2/Gaetz Avenue interchange

Deputy Premier Sarah Hoffman and local MLAs visit construction site

Bike thefts becoming ‘significant problem’ in Red Deer

Residents are sounding the alarm on the growing problem of bike theft… Continue reading

Red Deer approves 10 cannabis retail stores

Locations approved around the city

One trillion litres of sewage leaked into lakes and rivers over last five years

OTTAWA — Last Wednesday, a team of people from the Lake Ontario… Continue reading

Woman bitten at Red Deer dog park

Dog owners reminded to control their pets

WATCH: A horse was neglected by its owner. Now the horse is suing

ESTACADA, Ore. - Justice is an 8-year-old American quarter horse who used… Continue reading

Red Sox old-timer’s memorabilia going up for sale

BIDDEFORD, Maine — Some items belonging to one of the Boston Red… Continue reading

Rival Korea leaders to meet in Pyongyang in September

SEOUL, Korea, Republic Of — The rival Koreas announced Monday that North… Continue reading

Charlottesville anniversary: Peaceful protests, few arrests

WASHINGTON — Thousands of people wanting to send a message that racism… Continue reading

‘I believe music heals people’: 12-year-old records tribute for shooting victims

YARMOUTH, N.S. — Twelve-year-old Josh Cochrane of Yarmouth, N.S., watched the news… Continue reading

Fallen officers’ families gather with Justin Trudeau after tragedy

The prime minister laid flowers at the growing memorial to the four victims of Friday’s violence

Fallen officers’ families gather with prime minister after tragedy

FREDERICTON — Prime Minister Justin Trudeau met with families of fallen Fredericton… Continue reading

Liberals showcase benefits of billions spent on infrastructure projects

OTTAWA — Little more than a year before the next federal election,… Continue reading

Fredericton parade ‘a way to celebrate even in the midst of this grief’: mayor

FREDERICTON — Two days after four people were gunned down in a… Continue reading

Most Read

Five-day delivery plus unlimited digital access for $185 for 260 issues (must live in delivery area to qualify) Unlimited Digital Access 99 cents for the first four weeks and then only $15 per month Five-day delivery plus unlimited digital access for $15 a month