Dear Annie: My 24-year-old daughter is living with me because she cannot afford to live on her own with three baby boys. She could receive help from the government but chooses not to apply for assistance. She says it is embarrassing.
She does have a job, but gets no help from the fathers of the children (two different men).
This situation is not helping my marriage. My husband has been very patient with his stepdaughter and helps out, but he does not have any patience when it comes to her making the same mistake over and over -- having a child out of wedlock or when she’s not in a committed relationship.
How do I get my daughter to be more responsible and move out of my house? I love her and my grandchildren and have been helping them for four years, but I am tired and want my life back. — Mother With No Life
Dear Mother: As long as you are taking care of her, your daughter sees no point in getting help from the government or the children’s fathers. There are no financial consequences for her poor decisions. She won’t become more responsible until she is forced to.
Tell her to apply immediately for government assistance and file the necessary papers for child support, because you want her to move out within three months and she will need the money.
Help her by babysitting for the kids on occasion or buying her some household necessities, but stop enabling her manipulative, immature behavior.
Dear Annie: I work as a consultant in the health insurance industry. One thing you didn’t mention to “Cannot Take Back the Spoken Word” is that the blabbermouth working in the clinic is in violation of federal regulations and federal law from the Department of Health and Human Services (HHS), under the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA) privacy rules.
Both the “gossip girl” and the clinic may be liable for federal penalties. For more information and instructions on how to file complaints, readers can check the HHS website at hhs.gov/ocr/privacy. — R