Email discloses naughty behaviour

Five months ago, my girlfriend went to a job conference in Texas. When she came back, she used my computer and accidentally left her email open.

Dear Annie: Five months ago, my girlfriend went to a job conference in Texas.

When she came back, she used my computer and accidentally left her email open.

I found numerous pictures of her business trip, and several are of her sitting on the lap of another man.

She looks happy and he has his hands wrapped around her. The last picture, the most worrisome, is of her standing up and hugging this man, looking at him as if they were about to kiss.

I snooped a little more and found an email from him telling her how special she was and that he “never went that far with a woman before at these conferences.”

My girlfriend told me that her married co-worker was kissing another man.

I heard another co-worker say, “What happens in Texas stays in Texas.”

I haven’t mentioned anything about what I saw on the computer because I want to give my girlfriend the opportunity to tell me herself. I get the impression this secret is eating her up, and the result is, we are having serious problems.

So, how do I tell her I’ve read her e-mail? — Confused in Tulsa

Dear Tulsa: Honestly and soon. Tell your girlfriend she left her email open after her trip and you saw the photographs of her with the other man.

If she admits everything and you trust that she is telling the whole truth, you have a chance to put your relationship back on track.

Otherwise, sorry to say, it’s headed south.

Dear Annie: I am a 50-something woman who has been single for nearly 20 years.

I hadn’t even had a date in the current century and filled my time with work, grown children, friends, volunteer activities and hobbies. I was lonely, but figured no relationship is better than a bad one.

Recently, I became involved with a man who is 20 years younger.

It’s been fantastic, and honestly, we’re just two people.

I don’t notice the age difference when I’m with him.

I’m not writing for advice, because things are great right now. I have no expectations for a long-term future and am concentrating on living in the moment.

But I would like to hear from your readers who have been in this situation and ask how they handled difficulties, especially from their families. I realize his parents and my children have concerns about emotional turmoil and possible financial opportunism, but shouldn’t they be glad their loved one has companionship?

We see lots of older men with younger women. Is there a double standard of acceptance? — Not Harold and Maude

Dear Not Maude: Yes, as we often see in Hollywood, where older leading men are frequently (and sometimes ridiculously) paired with much younger women.

But society can become accustomed to all kinds of combinations, including yours, and our mail indicates there are a great many older women who are quite happy with younger men. Any readers who want to weigh in are welcome to do so.

Dear Annie: “Desperate” wrote that his “incredible” wife of 25 years won’t have sex with him, won’t talk about it and won’t go for counselling.

You said it might be a hormonal imbalance. I’d like to know what hormonal imbalance makes a woman discount her husband’s pleading.

Is there a hormone that causes cruelty, selfishness, hypocrisy and narcissism?

She’s got issues about sex, and it’s only fair she try to work on them.

Her husband is 52, and unless he wants to be “desperate” for another 30 years, he needs to lay down an ultimatum: either she goes to counselling and gives it a real shot, or she grants him a divorce.

There might be someone out there who thinks he’s “incredible,” and it would be nice if he finds her while he still has his own teeth. — John in L.A.

Dear John: We agree that his wife is being unreasonable, but unless he is willing to give her that ultimatum, he can only work on his response to the situation.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611.

Just Posted

Alberta hiring more paramedics and buying new ambulances, none for Red Deer

Red Deer Mayor Tara Veer is not concerned the provincial government didn’t… Continue reading

‘My nightmare began again’: Close call as bus carrying Humboldt crash survivor rear-ended

CALGARY — A terrifying ordeal for Humboldt Broncos survivor Ryan Straschnitzki this… Continue reading

Halifax airport operations normalize after Boeing 747 runway overshoot

HALIFAX — The Halifax Stanfield International Airport has resumed normal operations a… Continue reading

Bentley family left without a home grateful for community support

Central Albertans are coming together to support a Bentley family left homeless… Continue reading

Red Deer RCMP ready for new mandatory alcohol screening law

Red Deer RCMP are ready to enforce a new law intended to… Continue reading

WATCH: Red Deer and District Kennel Club Dog Show at Westerner Park

The Red Deer and District Kennel Club is holding a dog show… Continue reading

Pence aide out of running to be Trump’s next chief of staff

WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump’s top pick to replace chief of staff… Continue reading

Swath of South faces wintry mess: Snow, sleet, freezing rain

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — A massive storm brought snow, sleet, and freezing rain… Continue reading

‘I killed my best friend’: Opioids’ fatal grip on mayor, pal

MOUNT CARBON, Pa. — Janel Firestone found her son — the 24-year-old,… Continue reading

Brothers, 20, face second-degree murder charge in death of teen: police

MISSISSAUGA, Ont. — Police west of Toronto say two brothers have been… Continue reading

A young mayor, his friend, and a fatal attraction to opioids

MOUNT CARBON, Pa. — Janel Firestone found her son — the 24-year-old,… Continue reading

GM fights to retain key tax credit amid plant closing plans

WASHINGTON — General Motors is fighting to retain a valuable tax credit… Continue reading

TTC union asks provincial government to step in on transition to Presto

TORONTO — The union representing transit workers in Canada’s most populous city… Continue reading

Small pot growers find roadblocks on path to microcultivation licences

Yan Boissonneault’s daughter was turning blue. Without warning, his baby had stopped… Continue reading

Most Read