Dear Annie: My friend “Joe” is dying of cancer. He can be helped if he gets chemo, but he’s fallen in love with a woman who wants to marry him only to get his money.
She’s planning the wedding for next week and wants the two of them to take a six-week vacation before he gets treatment. I think he should get treatment first because the cancer has spread and he’s getting worse.
I’m not the only one who disapproves. I think we should do something before it’s too late. What’s your opinion? — A Good Friend
Dear Friend: There’s not much you can do if Joe is in love. It’s OK to express your concerns about postponing treatment. But will the chemo improve his quality of life or just prolong a debilitating state?
And if the gold digger makes him happy, try to accept her so you can be there when he needs you.
Dear Annie: I hope it’s not too late to respond to the letters about why men have affairs, because one has been bothering me. “Hollis, N.H.” says men are like primates and biologically programmed to mate with all females. I find that offensive and ridiculous.
It’s either a cheap slam on men or used to justify a promiscuous lifestyle. It can’t be squared with the reality of sexually transmitted diseases.
Mating with all willing females also maximizes a man’s chance of dying of a sexually transmitted disease. I just wonder why STDs are never part of these analogies. — Eric in Ottawa
Dear Eric: The logical conclusion is that the men who are programmed to cheat will die out, and those who are left will be less genetically predisposed to behave that way. An interesting thought.
Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to firstname.lastname@example.org, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611.