Lukewarm tea while eating crow

About a year ago I discovered a wonderful brand of night time tea containing a host of organic herbs including peppermint, chamomile, elderberry, lavender and licorice root. I find the mixture is wonderful for guaranteeing a good night’s sleep.

Array

Array

About a year ago I discovered a wonderful brand of night time tea containing a host of organic herbs including peppermint, chamomile, elderberry, lavender and licorice root.

I find the mixture is wonderful for guaranteeing a good night’s sleep.

I try to end each day with a cup of tea and start each one with a laugh.

For years my morning laugh came from Gary Larson via a page a day Far Side calendar.

Since that talented man retired I have had to look elsewhere for my laugh a day fix.

The calendar we have for 2010 not only has the usual cartoons on the front of every page but it also has things on the back ranging from word puzzles to what happened on this day in history to helpful outlines for things like grocery lists or instructions for babysitters.

Since Darcy is the first one up in the morning he is the one who tears off yesterday’s cartoon and reveals the new one for the day.

One morning, while flipping ahead to find the answer to a word puzzle I discovered that tomorrow’s cartoon had a list of all the moon phases for 2010 on the back. Since frosts often fall on the night of the full moon, that kind of information comes in handy for gardening.

“Don’t bother throwing tomorrow’s calendar page in the recycling,” I told Darcy as I prepared my tea for the night. “I want to keep it for the information on the back.”

“There’s information on the back? What kind of information?”

I served up one of my most superior looks as I asked, “You mean you’ve been tearing off pages for almost two weeks now and you haven’t even noticed all the word games and stuff on the back?”

He shook his head.

“Well!” I said as I dunked the tea bag up and down in my mug, “I guess we can’t all be as observational as I am.”

I was so wrapped up in thinking about my advanced eye for detail, that I accidentally let go of the tea bag and the little paper tab stapled to the string fell into the tea.

I hate it when that happens. I quickly pinched it out of the boiling hot water and in so doing, noticed some words printed on the tab.

“Kindness, like a boomerang, always returns.” I read out loud. “Hey! There’s a quote on my tea bag tab.” Did all the tea bags tags have quotes on them?

And if so, were they all different? I ripped open another tea bag packet and read, “The kindest word in all the world is the unkind word, unsaid.”

“I don’t believe this!” I said, reaching for a third. “Keep your words soft and tender because tomorrow you may have to eat them.”

By the time I read the fourth one, “When you realize you’ve made a mistake, make amends immediately. It’s easier to eat crow while it’s still warm.”

I was sensing a definite pattern and I didn’t like it one bit.

“Interesting selection of quotes, don’t you think?” Darcy said his face the very picture of innocence. “And you know what else is kind of interesting?”

“What?” I asked warily.

“You’ve been drinking that tea every single night for how long now?”

“A couple months or so,” I mumbled, though we both knew it was closer to a year.

“Yes, almost a year, and in all that time you never once noticed the quotes on the tab. It would appear,” he said, trying not to grin but failing miserably, “that someone’s observational skills aren’t so superior after all.”

After I had cleaned up the wrappers and finally sat down to drink my evening cup of tea I made yet another discovery; the only thing worse than eating cold crow is drinking lukewarm tea.

Shannon McKinnon is a humour columnist from northern BC. Check out Shannon’s new gardening blog as well as old columns at www.shannonmckinnon.com

Get local stories you won't find anywhere else right to your inbox.
Sign up here

Just Posted

A vial of the Medicago vaccine sits on a surface. CARe Clinic, located in Red Deer, has been selected to participate in the third phase of vaccine study. (Photo courtesy www.medicago.com)
Red Deer clinical research centre participating in plant-based COVID-19 vaccine trial

A Red Deer research centre has been selected to participate in the… Continue reading

Asymptomatic testing will now be available for "priority groups" who are most likely to spread the COVID-19 virus to vulnerable or at-risk populations. File photo by THE CANADIAN PRESS
Red Deer jumps to 449 active COVID-19 cases on Sunday

1,516 new cases identified in Alberta

The QEII was closed Sunday morning due to a pole fire. (Photo courtesy City of Red Deer)
UPDATE: QEII near Red Deer reopens

The QEII has been reopened after being closed due to a pole… Continue reading

Innisfail RCMP are investigating a single-vehicle crash that happened west of Bowden on March 21, 2021. (File photo by Advocate staff)
Bashaw RCMP investigate fatal collision in central Alberta

Bashaw RCMP are investigating after a fatal collision Saturday afternoon. Police were… Continue reading

A damaged unicorn statue is shown in a field outside of Delia, Alta. in this undated handout photo. It's not often police can report that a unicorn has been found, but it was the truth Saturday when RCMP said a stolen, stainless-steel statue of the mythical beast had been located in a field not far from where he'd been taken. THE CANADIAN PRESS/HO, RCMP *MANDATORY CREDIT*
Mounties get their unicorn; stolen statue of mythical beast found in Alberta field

DELIA, Alta. — It’s not often police can report that a unicorn… Continue reading

Investigators from the Vancouver Police Department were in Chilliwack Saturday, collecting evidence connected to a double homicide. (file photo)
Police investigate shooting death of man outside downtown Vancouver restaurant

Vancouver police say one man was killed in what they believe was… Continue reading

Dr. E. Kwok administers a COVID-19 vaccine to a recipient at a vaccination clinic run by Vancouver Coastal Health, in Richmond, B.C., Saturday, April 10, 2021. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Jonathan Hayward
B.C. to start registering people 18 years and older for COVID-19 vaccines

VICTORIA — The British Columbia government says it’s inviting people 18 years… Continue reading

San Jose's Tomas Hertl, center, celebrates with teammates Patrick Marleau, left, and Rudolfs Blacers, right, after Hertl scored a goal during the first period of an NHL hockey game against the Minnesota Wild, Friday, April 16, 2021, in St. Paul, Minn. (AP Photo/Stacy Bengs)
Patrick Marleau set to break Gordie Howe’s games record

For Patrick Marleau, the best part about Monday night when he is… Continue reading

Dr. Anthony Fauci, director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, speaks during a press briefing at the White House, Tuesday, April 13, 2021, in Washington. (AP Photo/Patrick Semansky)
Half of U.S. adults have received at least one COVID-19 shot

WASHINGTON — Half of all adults in the U.S. have received at… Continue reading

People are shown at a COVID-19 vaccination site in Montreal, Sunday, April 18, 2021, as the COVID-19 pandemic continues in Canada and around the world. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Graham Hughes
Federal government to send health-care workers to Ontario, Trudeau says

MONTREAL — Prime Minister Justin Trudeau says federal departments and some Canadian… Continue reading

People cross a busy street in the shopping district of Flushing on Tuesday, March 30, 2021, in the Queens borough of New York. Access to the COVID-19 vaccine in the United States is growing by the day. THE CANADIAN PRESS/AP-Kathy Willens
Despite COVID-19 vaccines, Americans in D.C. not feeling celebratory — or charitable

WASHINGTON — This might make Canadians jealous of their American cousins for… Continue reading

A man pays his respects at a roadside memorial in Portapique, N.S. on Thursday, April 23, 2021. RCMP say at least 22 people are dead after a man who at one point wore a police uniform and drove a mock-up cruiser, went on a murder rampage in Portapique and several other Nova Scotia communities. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Andrew Vaughan
Memorial service in Nova Scotia marks one year since mass shooting started

TRURO, N.S. — A memorial service is planned for today in central… Continue reading

In this April 23, 2016, photo, David Goethel sorts cod and haddock while fishing off the coast of New Hampshire. To Goethel, cod represents his identity, his ticket to middle class life, and his link to one the country's most historic industries, a fisherman who has caught New England's most recognized fish for more than 30 years. (AP Photo/Robert F. Bukaty)
‘It’s more than just a fish:’ Scientists worry cod will never come back in N.L.

ST. JOHN’S, N.L. — The latest assessment of Atlantic cod stocks, whose… Continue reading

Most Read