Some conditions treatable, others need counselling

Dear Annie: My husband and I have been married for almost 20 years. Our problems started to surface in the last six months.

Dear Annie: My husband and I have been married for almost 20 years.

Our problems started to surface in the last six months. My husband said I had a “bad side,” so I went into counseling because I didn’t like that part of my personality.

After my counselor mentioned PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder), I did a lot of research and started taking supplements.

I also saw my primary care physician to rule out a hormonal imbalance and depression.

She prescribed an antidepressant that I can take on an as-needed basis.

Here’s what’s bothering me.

What if it’s not me? What if it is really the relationship that needs fixing?

You would think after 19 years of living with somebody there would not be any secrecy or withholding of information because one of us is afraid of how the other will react.

But now I fear I’ve damaged our marriage beyond repair. What can I do? — Moody in Kansas

Dear Kansas: You can stop jumping to conclusions.

If you have a hormonal imbalance, PMDD, depression or other treatable condition, medication will help enormously and your husband should be thrilled.

If there are other problems in the relationship, they won’t disappear because you are afraid to talk about them. You must have the courage to communicate honestly so these issues can be dealt with.

Long-term emotional upheaval can be corrosive to a marriage, but you have an opportunity to make things better.

Please ask your husband to come with you for counseling so he can understand what is happening and you can work on it together.

Dear Annie: Recently, a terrible thing happened in our state.

The body of a young woman was found on the beach in front of a landmark hotel, and a convicted felon is being held for her murder.

From her pictures, she looked like a bright young woman, the type any family would be proud of.

I imagine her family is grief stricken that a life so full of promise was snuffed out.

I don’t mean to blame the victim, but young women far from home are often under the spell of a beautiful and exotic island.

I think they lose all caution and feel free to do things they would think twice about before doing back home.

The man the authorities arrested had been released from prison the day before the body was found.

He was probably looking for a vulnerable and unsuspecting girl out for a good time.

Drugs and casual sex were involved.

Now the young woman is gone forever. What a tragedy.

Winter vacations are coming up, and next summer, high-school seniors will celebrate graduation by traveling far from home.

It is my wish that teachers and parents will spend some time warning them to be cautious of those they meet.

We want them to have a wonderful time, but more than anything, we want them to return home safely. — Honolulu

Dear Honolulu: Thank you for reminding our readers to warn their children that they are not invulnerable, and that they need to understand the risks so they can take the necessary precautions.

Our condolences to the parents of that young woman.

Dear Annie: Like Between a Rock and a Hard Place, my husband and I are recovering alcoholics. When we told our friends and co-workers, we stopped receiving invitations to events because people assumed we wouldn’t attend.

Sobriety takes time. Eventually, Rock will be able to be comfortable in places where alcohol is served, but until then, he is wise to keep away.

What we found helpful was to tell co-workers ahead of time that we could only stay for a short while, and then enjoy a soda and leave.

This way, we make the attempt to socialize but have given ourselves an out if we start to feel the urge to drink. — Understanding

Please e-mail your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611.

Just Posted

Sport of axe throwing growing in Red Deer

True North Axe Throwing wants sport to be ‘Canadian version of darts’

Optimism remains for Red Deer hospital expansion

Red Deer’s incoming UCP MLAs both have been strong supporters of expansion

RDC cancels championship-winning golf program due to tight finances

Short season, small number of student golfers were also considerations

Fire investigators comb through industrial fire wreckage looking for answers

Industrial building in north Red Deer was completely gutted in Wednesday morning fire

WATCH: An ‘Eggstemely Fun Easter’ at Bower Place in Red Deer

Bower Place mall made sure Red Deer families were able to have… Continue reading

Notre Dame rector: “Computer glitch” possible fire culprit

PARIS — A “computer glitch” may have been behind the fast-spreading fire… Continue reading

Former journalist pleads guilty to robbing two banks in Medicine Hat

MEDICINE HAT, Alta. — A former journalist arrested almost two years ago… Continue reading

Austria fears for three top climbers missing in Banff National Park

BERLIN — Austrian Chancellor Sebastian Kurz said Friday his thoughts are with… Continue reading

As Vancouver fights over 4-20, Seattle’s Hempfest enjoys tolerance, some support

VANCOUVER — They both came from humble beginnings: small protests against marijuana… Continue reading

All eyes on the surging Greens as Prince Edward Island goes to the polls

After a brief provincial election campaign devoid of drama, voters on Prince… Continue reading

North Dakota company where 4 were slain seeks normalcy

MANDAN, N.D. — Camaraderie was so important for the “coffee club” at… Continue reading

Trump blasts ex-advisers who say he tried to stop Mueller

WASHINGTON — A day after celebrating the release of the Mueller report… Continue reading

Sanders claims she didn’t lie, despite Mueller finding

WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump’s spokeswoman Sarah Sanders pushed back Friday against… Continue reading

Most Read