Your ‘friend’ doesn’t understand friendship

Dear Annie: My friend “Lucy” was like a sister to me.

Dear Annie: My friend “Lucy” was like a sister to me. She doesn’t drive, so I took her to all her hair appointments, doctor’s visits, shopping, etc. She hated bad weather, so when it rained, I would sit with her. After her surgeries, I was the one who stayed overnight, helped her bathe and did her housework.

I let it pass when she complained about the way I hung the toilet paper and said I didn’t know how to properly fold a blanket.

I have a chronic pain illness, which Lucy has never acknowledged. Recently, she was angry when I went out with friends from my support group and accused me of not caring about her.

She yelled that I never took her anyplace. Later that day, my husband was admitted to the hospital, and Lucy never once called to see how he was. My grandson moved in last week, and when Lucy didn’t recognize his car, she started rumours that we must be taking in boarders.

She did e-mail to say her door is always open, but there was no apology. I no longer feel welcome around her. Still, I miss the friendship I thought we had, even though it was apparently one-sided. How do I get over this? — Hurt and in Pain

Dear Hurt: Lucy is one of those people who thinks the world revolves around her. This makes her a selfish friend, but it doesn’t mean you can’t periodically enjoy her company. If you want the friendship, you have to understand its limitations. Don’t put yourself out so much, and don’t expect anything in return. We think, however, that you ought to make an effort to find new friends who know how to reciprocate.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column.

Just Posted

UPDATED: Economy and health care expected to be hot election topics

Premier Rachel Notley makes announcement on Tuesday morning

Cruel and sadistic: Central Alberta dog rescuers believe there are dog fighting rings in province

With the increased number of stolen dogs, some central Alberta rescuers are… Continue reading

Red Deer hospital expansion recognized in throne speech

Society for Hospital Expansion in Central Alberta calls for more details

Mixed Nuts revue presented Saturday to kick off first Carole Forhan Theatrical Scholarship

Broadway songs, comedy skits are part of the Red Deer Players production

Opinion: Let’s be heard ‘loud and clear’ during provincial election campaign

By David Marsden During the banquet for Sunday’s Boston Bruins alumni game,… Continue reading

Documentary on Colten Boushie case to open Toronto’s Hot Docs festival

TORONTO — A film examining the case of a young Indigenous man… Continue reading

Want to help bees? Plant flowering herbs

Herbs are among the most useful plants in nature. They can tantalize… Continue reading

UN: Gene editing for human reproduction is ‘irresponsible’

GENEVA — A panel convened by the World Health Organization said it… Continue reading

Photos: Three moose spotted in Red Deer Tuesday

Three moose were spotted in Red Deer Tuesday morning. Red Deer resident… Continue reading

Andreescu rockets to No. 24 in WTA Tour rankings after Indian Wells title

Canada’s Bianca Andreescu has rocketed to No. 24 in the WTA Tour… Continue reading

Canadian figure skaters looking to reach new heights at world championships

Nam Nguyen, Alaine Chartrand and Kirsten Moore-Towers and Michael Marinaro all have… Continue reading

Man linked to largest art heist in history freed from prison

HARTFORD, Conn. — A reputed Connecticut mobster who federal authorities believe is… Continue reading

Most Read