Girlfriend forgives abuser

I’ve been dating “Dayna” for eight months, and we moved in together three months ago. We fell in love from the moment we met. I’m normally a calm guy. However, two months ago I made a mistake. I went out drinking with friends and was dropped off at home so drunk that I briefly blacked out. I got into an argument with Dayna and apparently gave her a black eye. I spent a month in jail on domestic battery charges. To my surprise, she did not break up with me, although we no longer live together. We each moved back in with our parents.

Dear Annie: I’ve been dating “Dayna” for eight months, and we moved in together three months ago. We fell in love from the moment we met.

I’m normally a calm guy. However, two months ago I made a mistake. I went out drinking with friends and was dropped off at home so drunk that I briefly blacked out. I got into an argument with Dayna and apparently gave her a black eye. I spent a month in jail on domestic battery charges. To my surprise, she did not break up with me, although we no longer live together. We each moved back in with our parents.

I know our relationship was moving too fast, but I believe in my heart that Dayna is the one for me. On the night of the incident, I had so much alcohol in my system that I’m pretty sure I would have fought with anyone who crossed my path.

Currently, I am enrolled in court-ordered classes on domestic violence. Although I know I don’t deserve her anymore, Dayna is still by my side, and I feel blessed for that. I made a promise to God while in jail to put the bottle down for good. I lost my job because of it, and it could have cost me my girlfriend. I’m not that person anymore. Alcoholism runs in my family. I’m a 27-year-old college-educated guy who dealt with problems by drinking because that’s what my family did. I’m determined to break the cycle and have made the first step toward that goal. I see life differently now, and all I want to do is make Dayna happy again. I know it will take time, but I’m determined to make it right with her and her family.

I love my girlfriend and hope to marry her one day. How do we bounce back from this horrific nightmare? — Sad and Depressed

Dear Sad: You need to rebuild Dayna’s trust. We are glad that you acknowledge your drinking problem and have taken steps to overcome it so you don’t repeat your mistakes. Dayna needs to know that you will remain sober over the long haul, through good and bad, and this takes much more time. Find a job, get your own place, live a solid life, and prove to Dayna that you are a man she can respect.

Just Posted

Updated: Red Deer welcomes 2019 Canada Winter Games Team Alberta

About 250 Alberta athletes are participating in the Games

Syrian immigrants feel welcomed

Winter Social held at Festival Hall to promote multiculturalism

Small group rallies with pro-immigration message

Group wanted to counter misinformation on United Nations migration agreement

Trump says ‘things are going very well’ with North Korea

WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump said Saturday that “things are going very… Continue reading

NDP won’t stop until Trans Mountain is built, says minister

Deron Bilous speaks at Red Deer chamber luncheon

Students seen mocking Native Americans could face expulsion

One 11-minute video of the confrontation shows the Haka dance and students loudly chanting

May plans next move in Brexit fight as chances rise of delay

Some say a lack of action could trigger a ‘public tsunami’

Group challenges ruling for doctors to give referrals for services that clash with beliefs

A group of five Canadian doctors and three professional organizations is appealing

Major winter storm wreaks havoc on U.S. travel

Nearly 5,000 flights were cancelled Sunday around the country

Quebec culture minister scolds Netflix over Lac-Megantic footage in ‘Bird Box’

MONTREAL — Quebec’s culture minister has penned a letter to Netflix’s CEO… Continue reading

Canadians across the country march to end violence against women

Women and their allies participated in marches across Canada on Saturday, from… Continue reading

Former Olympian Humphries files harassment complaint with Bobsleigh Canada

CALGARY — The national governing body for bobsleigh and skeleton has confirmed… Continue reading

Fire next door to B.C. pipeline fuel tank facility under control

BURNABY, B.C. — A fire just a few hundred metres from the… Continue reading

Why some elected Wet’suwet’en councils signed agreements with Coastal GasLink

SMITHERS, B.C. — It was a difficult decision to sign a benefit… Continue reading

Most Read