Supervisor has workers scared to speak up

I work in the aftercare program of a highly regarded private school. It’s a part-time job at minimum wage, but the kids are great, and I am grateful to be employed.

Dear Annie: I work in the aftercare program of a highly regarded private school. It’s a part-time job at minimum wage, but the kids are great, and I am grateful to be employed.

My problem is with the supervisor of the program. “Jane” constantly changes our group assignments, putting us with a different age group almost every day. This makes it difficult for the kids to bond with us as their caregivers and settle into a routine. Since the kids have various activities outside of our program, keeping up with the ever-changing schedules to make sure they get where they need to be is a nightmare.

Even worse, Jane sometimes subs if one of the regular caretakers is absent, and she is terrible with the kids. She frequently loses her temper and yells at them, and I overheard her tell one little boy that he was “bad” when he misbehaved. And several of us were present when she used racial slurs about some of the children.

One of my co-workers, “Sara,” finally decided she had to speak up, but when she went to Jane’s supervisor, it turned out Jane had already lodged a complaint about Sara, and instead of listening to what Sara had to say, they fired her. Sara was a dependable, dedicated worker who was loved by the kids. We think Jane sensed Sara’s growing dissatisfaction and struck first.

Sara’s dismissal has made the rest of us afraid to say anything to upper management for fear of getting the same treatment. What should we do? — Worried for the Kids

Dear Worried: You need to register a complaint about Jane in a large enough group that no one’s job is threatened. First document instances of mistreatment or inappropriate behavior with the children. Then several of you should speak to Jane’s superior, together, and present your record of evidence. Don’t make it personal. The school would not want to leave itself open to a lawsuit from parents.

Dear Annie: I am a 60-year-old divorced female and have been seeing “Harrison” for three years. Despite the fact that Harrison is a wonderful man — honest, funny, handsome, loyal and hardworking — there is one thing I can’t get past: He is terribly under-endowed, if you get my drift.

I’m embarrassed to even think of complaining about this, but it affects the whole lovemaking thing. I’ve always had a strong sex drive, and the lack of, um, size is unsatisfying.

How do I get past this? I truly care about Harrison and hate to think that I’m so shallow that his size would matter so much. It’s as petty as a man saying his girlfriend is great, but she’s flat-chested, so she’s out. But obviously it’s bothering me enough to write. What do you think? — Another Little Thing in the Way

Dear Little Thing: We won’t get into the “size doesn’t matter” discussion, because it obviously matters to you. First, try Kegel exercises (talk to your gynecologist for information). It is also possible to find greater satisfaction through different positions and techniques and the use of sex toys. But only you can determine how important this is to your relationship. If you truly love Harrison, this is something manageable. Otherwise, it’s simply a source of frustration.

Dear Annie: This is in response to “N.Y., N.Y.,” who didn’t want to visit her aging grandmothers. Guess what? It’s not all about you.

Those old people are still “in there” in that failing mind and body. Life gives us all kinds of opportunities to set aside our comforts and be of service to someone in need. Stopping by to say hello, even if we just hold their hand while they sleep or listen to their babblings, allows them to know at some deep level that we care about them. — Loving Daughter-in-Law, Eureka, Calif.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.

Just Posted

Alberta premier unhappy with Suzuki honorary degree but defends academic freedom

EDMONTON — Premier Rachel Notley says she does not agree with the… Continue reading

Sylvan Lake wants to create year-round tourist season

Public open house and workshops held May 10-12

Historical bylaws show a different Lacombe

Staff combed through records to find hundreds of outdated bylaws still on the books

Gravel companies facing fee increase

Red Deer County considering raising levy charged to gravel companies for road repairs

Excessive dog poop on Blackfalds ball diamonds frustrates town

Melting snow in Blackfalds uncovered ball diamonds full of dog poop, frustrating… Continue reading

WATCH: Red Deer students get active, healthy

Healthy Active Schools Symposium takes place in schools

Poll: Advocate readers support Trans Mountain pipeline expansion

Red Deer Advocate readers want the Trans Mountain Pipeline expansion to be… Continue reading

Celebrate all women this Mother’s Day in Central Alberta

A breakfast fundraiser is scheduled May 12 in Lacombe

Photo: Poplar Ridge Grade 6 class learn about newspapers

Red Deer Advocate editor Crystal Rhyno visited the school on Wednesday

‘The Heat’ doc examines gender barriers for top female chefs

TORONTO — In making a documentary about top female chefs, Toronto filmmaker… Continue reading

Hank Azaria willing to stop voicing Apu on ‘The Simpsons’

NEW YORK — Hank Azaria is ready to stop voicing Kwik-E-Mart owner… Continue reading

US stocks mostly fall in wobbly trading as costs, rates rise

NEW YORK — U.S. stocks are wobbling and trading mostly lower Wednesday… Continue reading

Most Read


Five-day delivery plus unlimited digital access for $185 for 260 issues (must live in delivery area to qualify) Unlimited Digital Access 99 cents for the first four weeks and then only $15 per month Five-day delivery plus unlimited digital access for $15 a month